My summer addictions...

I confess...I am an addict. Summer brings out the addict in me. It is not that I don't have addict tendencies during the school year...I just don't have as much time for them, or for that matter time to write about them. But in my effort to be a bimonthly blog updater...I had to get another post in before June passes us by!

My number one addiction...

FLIP FLOPS! Even though there are many studies that show I will be experiencing horrible body problems later in life because of my flip flop wearing...I don't care. They are so darn comfortable and so darn easy that I can't give them up. If it means I will be in a wheelchair at 35...bring it on! I will be riding with my flip flops.

Now, this summer addiction comes on really before the "official" start of summer. Any time the temperature gets above 57 degrees...I am wearing flops. You see 57 rounds up to 60 and I think that 60 is a perfectly normal temperature to wear flip flops.

Honestly, I am quite puzzled why doctors say flip flops are going to cause me so many problems, I mean people in Jesus' time wore sandals all the time and there is no record in the Bible of their back problems. I guess only time will tell what I am doing to my body with this addiction.

The second addiction is purely a summer addiction...

POP-ICE!! Seriously, have you guys eaten one of these this summer? You need to!

The best part about this addiction is that it is cheap! It cost about $3 for a box of a 100 of these things! They don't take up all your freezer space, because you just freeze the pops as you use them. They are best after they have been in the freezer only a couple hours and they are still a little slushy.

I love how clean this snack is. All the juice stays in the little pouch, so after you have enjoyed your ice, you get to suck up all the sweet juice! It is amazing. I am getting so tempted to have one just as I am writing this.

Go today to your local grocery store or wal-mart and buy these babies...you won't be disappointed!

My third addiction is the habit I want to kick...

MOVING! Yes, I have an addiction to moving. On July 1st, I will be indulging in this addiction once again and moving to a new apartment. This doesn't really qualify as a summer addiction as I have moved every 6 months over the last year and a half...This is one of those addictions that I desperately want to stop. I really dislike moving...it reminds me how much I hate having so much stuff. The only good thing about it is that it makes me get rid of clothes that I don't wear anymore and keepsakes that really aren't that keep-worthy.

Every time I get my boxes out to pack, I find stuff that I did not use the entire 6 months that I was in this place and that stuff goes to Good Will or gets chunk! It keeps me free of clutter that is for sure.

But even with those positives, I am ready to settle down so I don't have to keep taking my bed apart and moving all my furniture.

Recently, I was involved in a car accident and the cop looked at my drivers licence address and asked me how long I have lived here. I embarrassingly told him 5 years and he replied, "you should really get your address updated". I wanted to tell him, well once I find a house that I will live in for more than 6 months, I will get right on that. I can't imagine going to the DMV every 6 months, waiting in that long line, just to change my address. I think I hate going to the DMV more than I hate moving...

So those are my summer addictions. What are yours?!? I need to pick up a few more!

School's Out for Summer...Reflections on My First Year

Well, I have been out of school for officially one week! I am not going to lie...I am loving it. Maybe in a month, I will get tired of being free and living the good life, but for now I am enjoying it!

This year was tough, amazing, challenging, encouraging, and exciting all wrapped into one. I learned a lot of things as God took my "this is what I am going to do after graduation" spiel and fleshed it out into my reality.

It is a little bit nerve wracking when you spend 5 years of your life talking about what you are going to do, and then meeting that moment where you stop talking about it and start doing it. You spend 5 years dreaming about your life after you graduate from college only to find, that for the first 4 months of it, all you can do it wish you were back in college! But by the time April hit, I pretty much settled with the reality that I will wake up, teach kids, grade papers, have 3-4 hours of free time, and then do it all over again the next day. I was thankful that the Lord allowed me to adjust to my new stage in life.

If I had to sum up my first year in one word, I think it would be...HUMILITY.

I was humbled by...

not being good at consistent discipline

not being able to teach and communicate some math concepts

not always having truth on my tongue

not always knowing what to say when a student tells me about a difficult situation

not always loving my students the way they needed to be loved

not always speaking kindly to my students

not always being patient and quick to forgive

and realizing that many days I tried to teach and train students in my own strength rather than relying on my Heavenly Father.

But that last one is really what I think the definition of humility is...God reminding us by little things in life, "psst...hey...Sara...you are human...you are limited...you can't do these things without me...they are impossible."

Even though I would wake up every morning and pray for my day that was ahead of me, many times I would close my Bible and journal and function as if that prayer and scripture were meaningless. Usually...those were my worst days.

Often my best days were the mornings that I would wake up, have no energy, no joy, no love for my students, and beg God to do a miracle in my heart. He was always faithful. He never let me give up.

This year was really interesting. I met a lot of people that were WAY different than me. I taught kids who went to a different high school than I did. I am not just talking about the name on the building...I am talking about the high school experience. I taught a hundred kids this year, 5 of my kids were either pregnant themselves or were father's of recently pregnant girls. I taught girls that already had 1-2 kids. I had girls talk to me about their boyfriend's that were in jail. I had girls talk to me about suicide. I didn't deal with this stuff when I was in high school...heck some of them were dealing with things I have still YET to experience. All of these situations made me question why I was the teacher standing before them. I questioned why I was the one God put as the ear to these conversations.

If I am real honest with you...I still don't know.

I wish I could say, I know exactly what God was doing and I could see how he was pursuing each of these students through me...but I can't say that.

Most of the time I had to teach them math, and there were not a lot of opportunities for me to point blank speak God's truth to them.

There were times I felt disregarded because I was white. I was ridiculed for wearing "white" clothes (i.e. things from Gap). I kept asking God, why me? Why did you call me here? They don't want to listen to me, they don't trust me...someone else would be more effective.

Honestly, I still ask these questions...I am still humbled...humbled by the fact that because I am human, I might not get to know all the answers. I might never get to understand what is going on. But I am thankful for God's promise of another year to do it all over again.

I can't really explain why I have the drive to come back another year apart from the hope of God and apart from the privilege of knowing teenagers I would never know apart from this job, teenagers that God cares very deeply for.

Maybe you thought this post would be all the wisdom I have learned and all I have seen God do in the last semester...but it isn't. It is a post about the journey of humility and about being on the road as His follower, one who FOLLOWS, and being excited that I know not what that means...

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
-Hebrews 11:1